Lay Down Your Fight: Steps to Surrendering Completely to God 

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There are places inside of us that we closely guard. The idea of surrendering these sensitive areas—finances, relationships, stepping outside of our comfort zones, etc. can seem an insurmountable task. We fear what will happen if we lay down our fight. And the more fear we have surrounding our closely guarded places, the harder it is to relinquish our grasp. 

When we struggle to surrender it’s usually because we forget we are not actually at war with the One calling for the surrender. Doesn’t the word “surrender” imply we are in battle, and doesn’t every battle have an enemy? Not to mention, a general understanding of surrender closely correlates with defeat. Who wants to feel defeated? Let us pause here and acknowledge, surrender is going to be very difficult if we are imagining total defeat before a powerful enemy. 

Surrender is Not Defeat and God is Not Our Enemy 

Remember the prodigal son? He was the one with an inheritance burning a hole in his pocket. His father allowed him to make his own decisions and off he went on the ultimate bar crawl. After a few bar fights and one too many lost poker games, prodigal-boy humbly returns to a father who sprints across the fields to gather his son into his arms—where he belonged all along.  

The royal wardrobe change and feasting commences. The prodigal son could have surrendered at any point in the story. In the beginning when his inheritance was intact, or the hard way, after many losses, humiliations, and some pig slop. Either way, it was the same father. Loving, generous, open arms, and ready for a party.  

This is the God who loves us. This is the God who is inviting us to surrender and who already has a restoration plan in place if we decide to do things in the most difficult way, sans surrender.  

Surrender is not defeat and God is not our enemy.  

Surrender is an invitation and God is the Father who throws the party. 

An Invitation to Lay Down Your Fight 

Imagine sitting in a canoe. The current is strong. In the distance you see exactly where you want to go. Reaching for your double-sided paddle, you begin the work. You plunge one side of the paddle deep into the water. Like a duck’s webbed foot, it pushes the water away from the direction the canoe moves. Then in steady motion you plunge the other…wait…what’s wrong? It is only the end of a stick! To your surprise, the double paddle is broken on one side. The current moves rapidly and you are quickly losing your battle for forward motion.  

You clumsily try to make it work. You look ahead to the destination, but despite your best efforts and all your wave-thrashing, you are further away than when you started. But you refuse to be defeated. “I will not surrender!” The human spirit is strong and can thrash for a very. long. time.  

Now imagine you stop fighting the waves with your broken paddle. You lay it down, along with your fight, so you can recline in the boat, at rest. Maybe surrender looks like staring up at the stars while the rhythmic waves float you to a new destination. You watch the stars. You trust. You lay down your fight and accept the Father’s invitation to the party thrown in your honor, because what God has is infinitely better than anything you are holding on to. 

Four Steps Toward Total Surrender 

When it comes to surrendering, a symbolic gesture can be a meaningful reminder. Consider these steps to breaking down barriers and surrendering to God. 

1. Write the answer to this question on a piece of paper. 

If I stop fighting, (fill in the blank) will happen.  

Examples:  
If I stop fighting, my finances will fall apart. 
If I stop fighting, my relationship with my spouse will suffer 
If I stop fighting, depression will take over 

Whatever you put in the blank is the thing that needs surrendering. To be clear, surrender is not about becoming apathetic (defeated), it is about learning to trust. When you lay down your fight, what is it you are laying down? What is it you are trusting God with? Write your answer on the paper. 

2. Find a small jewelry box, a jar, or any container that you enjoy.

Take the piece of paper with the subject of your surrender written on it and fold it carefully. With an intentional prayer, symbolically fold the paper and place it in your container as an act of surrender.  

Your prayer may sound like this: 

God, I am doing my best to accept your invitation to surrender. I place (fill in the blank) into Your capable hands. I may need to do this again and again but, I want to trust You completely and I am asking for Your help. Amen.  

3. Bring softness.

Placing your struggles in a container separates the issue from you. This is a  powerful action, but sometimes those frustrated feelings will still rise. When this happens, you may feel tight, anxious, or angry. Whatever hard feelings come up, consider how you can bring softness. Close your eyes if you can, get full breaths, and imagine yourself softening the places of control and fear that surface. Imagine yourself letting go of that broken paddle and instead laying down in total surrender. Bring softness. 

Listen now to a short segment of an Abide sleep story I wrote based on Isaiah 2:4. It’s all about laying down your fight and resting in the arms of God.

Our surrender is to an open-armed Papa who can see our entire storyline, beginning to finish, and is inviting us to let go of _______ so we can get on with our best future.

To experience the full-length version of the above sleep story, download the Abide app. When you start a premium subscription you will gain access to our entire library of content. That includes more than 400 Bible-based sleep stories like “Weary Warrior,” and 1500+ guided biblical meditations. Use this link for 25% off.

Anna Boneh resides in Nashville, TN with her four daughters and two she-cats. She is a freelance writer and graphic designer, as well as a Literature and Writing teacher for middle and high-school students.